Blogging has been sporadic for a number of reasons. For one thing, I have been busy trying to meet deadlines. But my blogging is also in a state of transition, reflecting my life, which has also been in transition. Of course, everyone's life is always in transition. Life, like the weather, is a chaotic system.
But patterns do emerge. In my case I am only now beginning to settle into a routine replacing the one I had followed for so many years when I was employed. I think I tried to maintain a simulacrum of that after I retired, and I don't think that was a good idea. Actually, it wasn't an idea at all, just a mater of reflex, a habit. Underneath lay a certain anxiety, an unsureness over what exactly I should do next.
Lately, I have found myself, for some reason, feeling more relaxed, prepared to do at any moment whatever it occurs to me to do at that moment. I also find myself more open to improvisation, with less of a need to follow any clear and distinct plan of operation.
I think this change will start to be reflected more and more on this blog. Which is good. If anything should reflect one's life as one lives it, a blog of this sort should.
outstanding Frank!
ReplyDeleteG
That's great, Frank. Yep, it takes a while to recognize that the old routine isn't necessary any longer, that you really do have considerable actual freedom regarding what you want to do, and that there's nothing scary about it, either. That is when you're really retired and can start enjoying it thoroughly. Welcome to the club.
ReplyDelete"Lately, I have found myself, for some reason, feeling more relaxed, prepared to do at any moment whatever it occurs to me to do at that moment. I also find myself more open to improvisation, with less of a need to follow any clear and distinct plan of operation.
ReplyDeleteI think this change will start to be reflected more and more on this blog. Which is good. If anything should reflect one's life as one lives it, a blog of this sort should."
Awesome. Completely deserved, and wonderful that you're going in that direction. Things will only get more relaxed and better, I'm betting.
What you describe reminds me of what I go through sometimes when my semester at the college is over. At first it makes me feel jittery not to be pressed for time every minute, but then gradually the quality of time itself begins to change, things slow down, and my previous hurry begins to seem kind of addictive.
ReplyDeleteOne of my few regrets about my writing is that I wish I had put in more episodes about older Americans. So much to learn from them.